Epiphany Part II

I was at the Tuesday night campus contemporary worship service contemplating my earlier meeting with my field ed. advisor. I was looking around at my peers. The majority of us, between the ages of 22 and 35, wearing jeans, t-shirts, converse and sandals. I realized I couldn't really imagine any of us being leaders in the Church. I felt like there was some crucial step that we all were going to need to take in order to be able to stand at the pulpit.

Then all of a sudden it became clear to me. ( Jen your going to laugh at this because we have had plenty of conversations about this before) It's funny the lessons you learn, then forget and have to relearn.

I suddenly realized that I had been looking at things all wrong. Here I was holding in my mind some image of what it looked like to be a leader in the Church, an image that to say the least did not have many of the characteristics of myself and my peers. I had this image and had (particularly since getting to seminary) been trying to figure out what it was that I and my peers needed to change in order to fit into this picture.

What I realized is that it's not us that need to change. As I stood looking around I realized that we are not going to become leaders of the Church one day, we are not the future of the Church, but rather, we are the Church now. In our converse and jeans, on the younger end of the spectrum we have plenty to learn and plenty to experience but we don't need to turn into something different.

It's hard though when it feels like the Church is holding out. Waiting for you to be older, to be more experienced, to be more like the archetypal image of a Church leader that it holds so dear. I understand there are standards that the Church must hold its leaders to, but the question is are these standards serving to strengthen the Church or are they simply making people feel safe? To feel strong and to feel safe are two very different things. I worry we may be a Church that feels safe but is lacking in strength.

Needless to say, I have started looking for a church at which to do my field education. My one criteria so far, it must be a church willing to take me as I am, not as I will be one day. (That's not to say that I don't intend to grow along the way.)

hmmmm,

Amanda